Uh-oh...With those words, I pretty much knew what I was going to see when I rounded the corner. More than likely, there would be a dog on a tight leash trying to move away from a looming stranger with an outstretched hand on a trajectory for the top of the fearful dogs' head.
Sure enough, as the scenario seemed to unfold in slow motion, I heard a loud "No!" erupt from the handler and an even louder expletive from the stranger. Not surprisingly, the obscenity started with the sixth letter of the alphabet and ended with the eleventh. At the same time of the verbal correction, the handler jerked the leash back with enough force to cause the Heeler to lose his balance. The stranger continued with his tirade by shouting that her dog was aggressive and that she had no control over her dog. The icing on the cake was when he asked her if she was going to punish the dog for being an a-hole. "He shouldn't be allowed to get away with behavior like that! You have to show him who's boss." All the while, he was moving forward toward the dog - Umm...hello? - as if he would be the one showing the dog who the boss is. The Heeler of course, was barking uncontrollably and trying to get behind the woman.
"But it's not even my dog! I'm just taking care of him while his owners are out of town. They said he was really friendly... I'm sorry!" Perhaps that testament was the man's cue to leave; his admonishment wouldn't have the same affect on someone who didn't even own or know the dog very well. When the man noticed my approach, he turned to walk away but not before uttering some unintelligible diatribe about stupid dogs and stupid people.
Whatever.
I stopped about twenty feet from the woman and asked her if she was okay. She said she was a little shaken from the experience and didn't know why Bob tried to bite the man. Bob the Heeler was staring off in the direction where the stranger had left, while emitting a low, throaty growl. Just for good measure - or for no good reason whatsoever - the woman gave Bob a couple of quick leash pops and told him to "quit it". The poor guy looked pathetic sporting a heavy choke chain, the size you might see on a Rottweiler or German Shepherd Dog. The woman's tension on the leash, as well as Bob's opposition reflex kicking in did nothing to help him stop pulling against the pressure. His once throaty growl now sounded more like a kid's kazoo.
"Why don't you calmly say his name and when he turns toward you, let out some slack on that leash. Make a kissy sound to get his attention if you have to. If it's alright with you, I'll drop a few treats and step away a few feet. Let's get his attention on something other than that nasty guy that just left." So she did. And Bob readily took the treats. And she started to breath. Subsequently, so did Bob.
We talked for a few minutes; all the while tossing treats for Bob; and I learned that the man had insisted on petting the dog, spewing the proverbial "Don't worry, dogs really like me!" adage. AarRRRrrgh! Annie (name changed to protect the innocent dog sitter) said she attempted numerous times to step off the side of the trail and told the man that she didn't think Bob liked him. She thought the man interpreted it to mean MOVE FORWARD IN A BENT POSITION, SPEAK LOUDLY, HANDS OUTSTRETCHED TOWARD THE GROWLING DOG. Bless her heart; she did her best to warn the butthead, but to no avail.She admitted that she was trying to get a walk in with Bob before 6 p.m., as she was in a hurry to get to an appointment. The combination of the man's zombie-like insistent approach, along with Bob's subsequent Edvard Munch response caught her off guard. She'd never taken Bob on this trail, and she wasn't aware that his guardians had in the past either. She thought the experience would be "fun" for him, as he seemed to be missing his people. And, she attested, Bob's outburst kinda embarrassed her. After all, the man said dogs really liked him...
Why are we so concerned what a stranger thinks when we are trying to manage our dog's environment and emotional well-being, while kindly asking them to move along and they don't? In an interview with Karen Pryor about her latest book, Every Dog Every Day, Kay Laurence; a brilliant dog trainer from Great Britain; talks about the difficulties dogs have living in our modern world. When asked to explain the meaning that we should not be trying to change dogs, but instead we should change the world in which they live, Kaye responds, "Change the attitude of people toward dogs - the attitudes of those from the outer world who do not love dogs, and the attitudes of those from the inner world who live with dogs. The expectations are often a continent away from reality. It is human nature to want to touch and interact with a dog. However, I do not think that it is appropriate for any stranger, or even friend or acquaintance, to touch or pet your dog without asking first. A person should have the grace to step away if the touch is not welcomed. People are trying to live with dogs in more and more inappropriate environments, perhaps without realising the difficulties for the dog."
Jessica Dolce, creator extraordinaire of Dogs In Need of Space (or otherwise affectionately known as DINOS), posts in her fantabulous blog of the same name, Stop Caring What Others Think and Stand Up for Your Dogs.
Check it out. Share the pdf version of the blog post. Sing it from the tops of your lungs. Stand up for your dog.
Knowing that Annie had to get to her appointment post haste, I mentioned that I was a professional dog trainer and would love to chat with her some more about reading dog body language, leash walking skills and managing Bob's environment in order to set him - and her - up for success. She seemed genuinely happy when I gave her my business card (I always have a few on me; those and dog treats that eventually end up in the washing machine) and promised to call in a few days. With an upbeat chirp, "C'mon Bob! Let's go!" off they trotted into the sunset - literally and figuratively.
Sure enough, a few days later Annie did call. She said she'd thought a lot about our conversation and realized what a tough situation she'd put both of them in. She was uncomfortable about letting the nutso dog whisperer touch "her" dog, but the over-riding surge of embarrassment didn't allow her to listen to her gut and stand up for Bob. She wanted to learn how to get past those feelings because she truly cared for Bob and hoped to continue to take care of him when his people were out of town. I told her that speaking up doesn't necessarily come naturally; that it requires practice and muscle memory, not unlike rubbing your belly and patting your head at that same time. Or holding your toothbrush in the opposite hand while brushing your teeth. It feels awkward at first, but then it becomes habit - in a good way. We made an appointment for the following week. I'm really looking forward to working with her and her four-legged friend - the times, they are a changin'. Thanks, Bob.
Photo credit: ©Wyn & Mary Burch. Ph.D., www.caninegoodcitizen.wordpress.com